CameronsCastle: The Perils of Public Transportation

Bend has joined the big leagues, people.

Bend has a bus system now.

Well, it's not so much a "system" as it is four recycled Dial-A-Ride short busses and two new, sparkly big busses... all of which follow only six routes that take you to the four corners of the city limits. And that's it. Not to Redmond, not to LaPine. Certainly not to Prineville.

I guess it's a start.

So! I thought it might be a good (and fun!) idea to take the kids on the new BAT busses (Bend Area Transit, get it?) between the time that Cameron and I picked up Bailey and when I had to pick up Courtney from gymnastics practice because we were going to have a big sleepover on Thursday night and then lounge around the house Friday morning eating cinnamon rolls until it was time to go to the pumpkin patch. Again.

At least I thought it would be a good idea. When it comes to lofty goals, especially involving the kids, I tend to get a little glass-is-half-full and all romantic about things.

I was going to teach the kids about public transportation! Hang with other users-of-public-transportation. Hey kids! Let's save the environment! We started out all excited and energized... picking out our route, deciding which side of the street we were going to have to stand on that corresponded with the route that we chose... it was very fun. For the first ten minutes. Because, as it turns out, when an Area Transit system only has six busses to complete six different routes, you have to wait a while for the bus to complete its route before it gets back to you.

This was lofty-idealism-ruining moment #1 for me. We waited for 35 mintues for the bus to pick us up.

But once we got on the bus, we were all smiles. The irony that it was one of the short, recycled Dial-A-Ride busses was not lost on me, however, because again! lofty idealism and I really, really wanted one of the new sparkly busses. Nevertheless, we began making plans and talking loudly and in earnest about them. We were going to have dinner at Johnny Carinos, get dessert at Coldstone and then make it back just in time to pick Courtney up. The perfect early dinner and dessert!

As it turns out, it's a good thing we were talking loudly and in earnest because one of the other passengers overheard our "conversation" and asked me if I had even bothered to look at the bus schedule for the day.

Me: (thinking to myself... Ummm, there's a schedule?) Why, no! I thought the busses ran until at least the evening.

Strange, but increasintly helpful, Man: No, no, no. The last drop off is somewhere around 6:00 and could someone get this poor woman a schedule please?

Me: (looks at watch) Oh, it's 5:25. Okay, kids! Change of plans!

You may have already recognized this as lofty-idealism-ruining moment #2 for me.

About this time, Mr. Bus Driver, in response to Strange Man's request to get me a schedule, hands me a four-foot by four-foot "Riders Guide," cleverly folded up and looking like a map of Oregon, Washington AND Idaho. Glancing at it as if to say, "look, pal... I have two kids here and won't have time to even figure out how to open the rider's guide no matter how shiny and pretty it is" I stare at Mr. Bus Driver squarely in the face and tell him I have two kids under 6 in short sleeved shirts, and when will you be back to pick us up?

As God is my witness, I swear he told me to be back at the North Entrance to JC Penny's (aka the "Robal Road Stop" along BAT's Route #4) at 6:00 pm. Sharp.

Our change of plans involved having dessert before dinner, so the kids were thrilled. One trip to Coldstone later, we were anxiously awaiting the return of the bus to take us back to downtown Bend for some real dinner. The three of us were standing at our pre-arranged meeting place at 5:55.

And we waited.